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    Happy Birthday Robert Burns!

    Campbell Brodie
    Campbell Brodie
     
     

    Scotland Male Posts : 56189
    Join date : 2011-08-13
    Age : 65
    Location : Scotland

    Happy Birthday Robert Burns! Empty Happy Birthday Robert Burns!

    Post by Campbell Brodie on Sun 25 Jan 2015 - 10:53

    "To a fart"... Happy Birthday Robert Burns! 3025408739



    Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
    Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie
    Just as ye sit doon among yer kin
    There sterts to stir an enormous wind.

    The neeps and tatties and mushy peas
    Stert working like a gentle breeze
    But soon the puddin wi the sauncie face
    Will have ye blawin' all ower the place.

    Nae matter whit the hell ye dae
    A'bodys gonnae have tae pay
    Even if ye try to stifle,
    It's like a bullet oot a rifle.

    Hawd yer bum tight tae the chair
    Tae try and stop the leakin air
    Shift yersel frae cheek to cheek
    Prae tae God it doesnae reek.

    But aw yer efforts go assounder
    Oot it comes like a clap of thunder
    Ricochets aroon the room
    Michty me, a sonic boom!

    God almighty it fairly reeks;
    Hope I huvnae shit ma breeks
    Tae the bog I better scorry
    Aw whit the hell, its nae ma worry

    A'body roon aboot me chokin,
    Wan or twa are nearly bokin
    I'll feel the better for a while
    Cannae help but raise a smile.

    Wis him! I shout with accusin glower,
    Alas! tae late, hes just keeled ower
    Ye dirty bugger they shout and stare
    I dinnae feel welcome and mair.

    Where eer ye mae be, let yer wind gan free
    Sounds like just the job fur me
    Whit a fuss at Rabbie's perty
    Ower the sake o wan we ferty.



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    Mcqueen
    Mcqueen
     
     

    England Male Posts : 30060
    Join date : 2011-08-13
    Age : 66
    Location : England

    Happy Birthday Robert Burns! Empty Re: Happy Birthday Robert Burns!

    Post by Mcqueen on Sun 25 Jan 2015 - 10:57

    Happy Birthday Robert Burns! 2485877773 Happy Birthday Robert Burns! 3025408739 Happy Birthday Robert Burns! 3318427985
    Adam Mint
    Adam Mint
     
     

    Scotland Male Posts : 22569
    Join date : 2011-10-07
    Age : 55

    Happy Birthday Robert Burns! Empty Re: Happy Birthday Robert Burns!

    Post by Adam Mint on Sun 25 Jan 2015 - 14:07

    Don't recall getting taught that one at school...

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    Happy Birthday Robert Burns! Empty Re: Happy Birthday Robert Burns!

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      Current date/time is Sat 24 Oct 2020 - 4:58