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    Drink driving?

    Gypsy
    Gypsy
     
     

    Spain Female Posts : 12665
    Join date : 2011-08-14

    Drink driving? Empty Drink driving?

    Post by Gypsy on Mon 21 Oct 2013 - 16:12

    True story reported by an English guy who was stopped and asked to give a breathalyser test.

    The English guy lives near Le Bugue in the Dordogne and at the time he was stopped he was as pis*ed as a fart...

    The gendarme signals to him to wind down the window then asks him if he has been drinking, and with a slurring speech the English guy replies; 'Yes, this morning I was at my (hic)..daughter's wedding, and as I don't like church much I went to the cafe opposite and had several beers. Then during the wedding banquet I seem to remember downing three great bottles of wine; (hic)... a corbieres, a Minervois and (hic)...a Faugeres. Then to finish off during the celebrations.... and (hic) during the evening ...me and my mate downed two bottles of Johnny Walker's black label.'

    Getting impatient the gendarme warns him; 'Do you understand I'm a policeman and have stopped you for an alcohol test'?

    The Englishman with a grin on his face replies; 'Do you understand that I'm English, like my car, and that my wife is sitting in the other seat, at the steering wheel?'
    Adam Mint
    Adam Mint
     
     

    Scotland Male Posts : 21222
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    Age : 54

    Drink driving? Empty Re: Drink driving?

    Post by Adam Mint on Mon 21 Oct 2013 - 16:41

    Earlier this year in Menorca, got barman to phone us a taxi, I open the door and start to get in, WTF...

    I'm sitting on the drivers knee...
    searcher
    searcher
     
     

    Scotland Male Posts : 6686
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    Post by searcher on Mon 21 Oct 2013 - 20:31

    Somehow Adam I just can't imagine you having a holiday in MENORCA:  :Not me Guv:
    Gypsy
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    Spain Female Posts : 12665
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    Post by Gypsy on Mon 21 Oct 2013 - 21:09

    searcher wrote:Somehow Adam I just can't imagine you having a holiday in MENORCA:  :Not me Guv:
    You see him more as Ayia Napa man Drink driving? 2485877773 
    Perfectspecimen
    Perfectspecimen
     
     

    Liechtenstein Male Posts : 13600
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    Age : 64
    Location : Cambs / Golf del Sur

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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Mon 21 Oct 2013 - 21:24

    More a Yelas man at his age. Drink driving? 3025408739



    Adventure before dementia!!! Drink driving? 294053457
    Adam Mint
    Adam Mint
     
     

    Scotland Male Posts : 21222
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    Post by Adam Mint on Mon 21 Oct 2013 - 22:44

    searcher wrote:Somehow Adam I just can't imagine you having a holiday in MENORCA:  :Not me Guv:
    Wasn't my choice, but we made the best of it...

    Gypsy wrote:
    searcher wrote:Somehow Adam I just can't imagine you having a holiday in MENORCA:  :Not me Guv:
    You see him more as Ayia Napa man Drink driving? 2485877773 
    mmmm, a possible...

    Perfectspecimen wrote:More a Yelas man at his age. Drink driving? 3025408739
    Nice island, shame about the pub...
    Perfectspecimen
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    Liechtenstein Male Posts : 13600
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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Tue 22 Oct 2013 - 10:09

    But you can sit outside and take the piss out of the saddos in the bar next door, twice as much the beer in there costs. Happy to pay that of course these pot bellied pink skinned Scots just so they can sit there in their green and white hooped uniforms. The saddest thing of course is the number of kids who have to sit there watching their parents acting like monkeys when they should be at school learning how to make an honest living. There is an empty shop next door, a Greggs would go down just perfect.



    Adventure before dementia!!! Drink driving? 294053457
    Gypsy
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    Spain Female Posts : 12665
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    Post by Gypsy on Tue 22 Oct 2013 - 12:10

    Perfectspecimen wrote:But you can sit outside and take the piss out of the saddos in the bar next door, twice as much the beer in there costs. Happy to pay that of course these pot bellied pink skinned Scots just so they can sit there in their green and white hooped uniforms. The saddest thing of course is the number of kids who have to sit there watching their parents acting like monkeys when they should be at school learning how to make an honest living. There is an empty shop next door, a Greggs would go down just perfect.

    Drink driving? 2485877773 Drink driving? 2485877773 good 
    Adam Mint
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    Post by Adam Mint on Tue 22 Oct 2013 - 14:12

    Perfectspecimen wrote:But you can sit outside and take the piss out of the saddos in the bar next door, twice as much the beer in there costs. Happy to pay that of course these pot bellied pink skinned Scots just so they can sit there in their green and white hooped uniforms. The saddest thing of course is the number of kids who have to sit there watching their parents acting like monkeys when they should be at school learning how to make an honest living. There is an empty shop next door, a Greggs would go down just perfect.
    Whats Cam done to upset you...
    Perfectspecimen
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    Liechtenstein Male Posts : 13600
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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Tue 22 Oct 2013 - 14:24

    Exception to the rule Cam is, no pot belly.



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    Mermaid
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    Post by Mermaid on Wed 23 Oct 2013 - 10:30

    Adam Mint wrote:
    Perfectspecimen wrote:But you can sit outside and take the piss out of the saddos in the bar next door, twice as much the beer in there costs. Happy to pay that of course these pot bellied pink skinned Scots just so they can sit there in their green and white hooped uniforms. The saddest thing of course is the number of kids who have to sit there watching their parents acting like monkeys when they should be at school learning how to make an honest living. There is an empty shop next door, a Greggs would go down just perfect.
    Whats Cam done to upset you...
    i was wondering that as well Drink driving? 3275847336



    Live life to the full now or it could be too late
    Perfectspecimen
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    Liechtenstein Male Posts : 13600
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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Wed 23 Oct 2013 - 13:13

    Go and check the place out if you think I'm exaggerating, it pretty much sums up all that is embarrassing about Brits abroad. And yes, I know I'm not really the best example.......Drink driving? 3025408739



    Adventure before dementia!!! Drink driving? 294053457
    Campbell Brodie
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    Scotland Male Posts : 46715
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    Post by Campbell Brodie on Wed 23 Oct 2013 - 17:46

    I've never been in The Hoops Bar...or Yelas. Drink driving? 3025408739 In fact, I've never had a drink in any bar on the Funchal strip...lol! 



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    Mcqueen
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    England Male Posts : 27875
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    Post by Mcqueen on Wed 23 Oct 2013 - 18:28

    Would you remember Drink driving? 878948377 
    Campbell Brodie
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    Post by Campbell Brodie on Wed 23 Oct 2013 - 18:31

    Yep! I don't like those tiny, wee bars. You couldn't have a game of darts in them! Drink driving? 3025408739 



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    Perfectspecimen
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    Liechtenstein Male Posts : 13600
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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Wed 23 Oct 2013 - 19:00

    You just sit there drinking and watching peeps go by, and buses. Oops nearly forgot, and prostitutes. You can chat with pensioners, always got a tale or two, or even me! You can watch all the sports on the tele too, even Rugby and darts. However the greatest attraction has to be Dorada for €1 a pint, marvellous. 
    Drink driving? 2084528412 
    Hoops does have a pool table, but the balls dont go straight or the cues so I wouldnt bother, and I'm shite at darts.



    Adventure before dementia!!! Drink driving? 294053457
    Campbell Brodie
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    Post by Campbell Brodie on Wed 23 Oct 2013 - 19:49

    Have you seen the size of that Buckie's Bar below the Irish Times? Guy called Tony runs it, we give him a wee smile as we walk upstairs to the Times. I think the fire regulations stipulate only 2 punters allowed...Drink driving? 3025408739 



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    Adam Mint
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    Scotland Male Posts : 21222
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    Post by Adam Mint on Thu 24 Oct 2013 - 1:53

    It's the real Tenerife,,, innit...
    Topdog
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    Post by Topdog on Thu 24 Oct 2013 - 9:21

    Once I went there, not over friendly.
    Perfectspecimen
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    Liechtenstein Male Posts : 13600
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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Thu 24 Oct 2013 - 13:39

    They dont like gob shites........



    Adventure before dementia!!! Drink driving? 294053457
    Perfectspecimen
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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Thu 24 Oct 2013 - 13:40

    Mind you, there is a bloke in Yelas every day with a pony-tail. Drink driving? 3025408739



    Adventure before dementia!!! Drink driving? 294053457
    3rdforum
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    Post by 3rdforum on Thu 24 Oct 2013 - 14:03

    Perfectspecimen wrote:You just sit there drinking and watching peeps go by, and buses. Oops nearly forgot, and prostitutes. You can chat with pensioners, always got a tale or two, or even me! You can watch all the sports on the tele too, even Rugby and darts. However the greatest attraction has to be Dorada for €1 a pint, marvellous. 
    Drink driving? 2084528412 
    Hoops does have a pool table, but the balls dont go straight or the cues so I wouldnt bother, and I'm shite at darts.
    Sundowners do "Dorada" for 1 euro??? I'm going to feckin live there next summer  Drink driving? 3025408739






    Mcqueen
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    Post by Mcqueen on Thu 24 Oct 2013 - 14:27

    €1 Half pint Dermo Drink driving? 3025408739 
    Perfectspecimen
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    Liechtenstein Male Posts : 13600
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    Post by Perfectspecimen on Thu 24 Oct 2013 - 19:16

    3rdforum wrote:
    Perfectspecimen wrote:You just sit there drinking and watching peeps go by, and buses. Oops nearly forgot, and prostitutes. You can chat with pensioners, always got a tale or two, or even me! You can watch all the sports on the tele too, even Rugby and darts. However the greatest attraction has to be Dorada for €1 a pint, marvellous. 
    Drink driving? 2084528412 
    Hoops does have a pool table, but the balls dont go straight or the cues so I wouldnt bother, and I'm shite at darts.
    Sundowners do "Dorada" for 1 euro??? I'm going to feckin live there next summer  Drink driving? 3025408739
    No thats Yelas bar in Los Cris Dermot. Sundowners is €1.50, bit more up market. Well, perhaps not. Less competition then.



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